Be careful what you wish for

 

They say, ‘be careful what you wish for, because you might get it.’

But that statement is rather singular in my opinion. Singular, because it doesn’t take into account the multi-faceted fuckery that is part and parcel of life.

 

Let’s face it, no decision to change or move beyond your comfort zone will ever be made in a void. Meaning, everything you do will be subject to people—who have their own baggage, their own agendas, etc. In which case, it’s probably more fitting to say ‘be careful of who is already on the other side of what you wish for.’

 

For instance, who is on the other side of a new job, a new neighbourhood, a new love interest? Your wish, your joy, your journey, will most likely be misaligned with those on the other side. And when this misalignment occurs, it is tempting to cite that old chestnut aka adage—be careful what you wish for—with a sigh of cynicism. But the saying is only true if we could wish in a vacuum.

 

If we could wish in a vacuum, we would be wishing for that new job to include the perfect team and/or environment, we would be wishing for the new house to include perfect neighbours, and we would wish for the new love interest to have no history with someone else. But we all know that wishing won’t make it so.

 

Which begs the question, what do you do when your wish is served up with a side of fuckery? While it’s natural to have a knee-jerk reaction and want to revert to the old, familiar ways or routines or people, it will serve you well to remember that the foundations of that sentiment is good old fashioned conditioned fear. And conditioned fear is never working for us, it is always working with the small, fearful parts of ourselves like self-doubt. The parts that are comfortable playing it safe.

 

But there is no glory in playing it safe. The athlete doesn’t win competitions in the absence of training, the diamond isn’t created in the absence of pressure, and the storm cannot rage in the absence of friction. The same is true for any new opportunity or encounter that can potentially lead you down the path of change, growth, and evolution—if you let it.

 

If you choose to follow the path of change, it is best to do so with an open mind. If you choose to follow the path of change, it is best to be prepared for moments of turbulence, as well as brief-to-extended bursts of ‘what the fuck have I done?’. Because you will have those moments. It is impossible to live in a void—in a state of curated perfection. Our lives are not Instagram posts.

 

When you get your wish (with a side of fuckery), keep treading that uncharted path of change until you are (or until you realise that you are), as Earl Nightingale so eloquently says, “standing right in the middle of your own acres of diamonds”. Diamonds that are yet to be mined, that are yet to sparkle, while you undergo pressure before becoming. Like a spring bud straining to burst into flower, or the cocooned caterpillar growing butterfly wings, your path to change cannot unfold without pressure, conflict, tension—fuckery.

 

Without pressure, we stay the same—unpolished stones buried in a field. But once pressure is exerted, and we persist along the path of change, we will eventually find ourselves “in the middle of [our] own acres of diamonds.” And surely that moment alone is worth a little (or lot of) fuckery along the way?